


A Million Places I Can Be

by dedougal



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-04-05
Updated: 2011-04-05
Packaged: 2017-10-17 15:15:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,646
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/178198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dedougal/pseuds/dedougal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When your bosses want to know exactly how Jared Padalecki managed to become entangled in the hunt for the most wanted domestic terrorists in the country, you better believe Jensen is going to tell them. Spy AU.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Million Places I Can Be

“Agent Ackles.”

“Sir.”

“Why don’t you tell us, in your own words, about how the Padalecki incident started?”

“It’s an incident? That’s...”

“How did it all begin?”

****

I never knew why Chris decided on that club. His band had just played an amazing gig. Like the entire place had been caught up in it. And as his best friend slash colleague slash unofficial roadie, I was there to schlep equipment. And after we’d got the stage to rights, it was time to celebrate. We drank until the bar chucked us out but we all still high from the gig so Chris suggested we hit this club.

I didn’t know it was a gay club until we were at the bar. Chris swore he didn’t care, ordered shots all round and then hit the dance floor. He was obviously drunk enough not to care what he was doing as he was soon just wearing his jeans and a black cowboy hat. I suppose even Chris wouldn’t stoop to stealing a pink one.

But I was quite drunk myself by this point and watching the guys dance and I didn’t notice the man – Jared – until he was leaning up against the bar next to me. And he was just looking at me like I was the only other person in the room. Then Chris showed up and there were more shots and Jared and I were making out. I went back to his.

****

“So that’s how it began. But I understand than Mr Padalecki was more than just a ‘hook up’.”

“I had intended nothing more. And I did not believe I would see Jare- Mr Padalecki again.”

“Please explain what happened next.”

****

Something had gone wrong and the extraction wasn’t going to fly, not this time. I was in the middle of Barcelona, no idea where the van with Chris in it was and about thirty seconds ahead of some really nasty guys with really big guns. The best bet was to head for the main tourist areas. Of course, I’d barely turned into the street leading to the Sagrada Família when I ploughed into an oddly familiar person.

“Jensen?” Jared said, ducking to look into my eyes. He had his sunglasses pushed up into his ridiculous floppy hair to keep it out of his eyes and a camera hanging around his neck. He looked happy.

“Jared! Wow! What are you doing here?” I felt ridiculously out of place in my suit and tie. I didn’t even have sunglasses. I stuck out like a sore thumb.

“Holiday. Always wanted to come here. I graduated college and decided to tour Europe before settling into a job.” Jared stared at me liked he was drinking in my appearance. Then he looked a little rueful. “Although I guess I didn’t realize how lonely it would be on my own.”

“On your own?” I thought quickly and grabbed the carrier bag in Jared’s hand. Sure enough, it contained a tacky tourist t-shirt. I stripped off my jacket and tie, dumping them inside the bag and drawing out the t-shirt. I could see the security squad from the Consul’s office making progress through the crowd. No time to waste. I struggled into it – Jared had bought it in his size and it more than fit over my shirt. “Ta da! No longer alone. Now you’re with me.” I grinned rather manically at him.

Jared laughed in a half-worried, half-amused way. I looped my arm around his waist and he automatically laid an arm across my shoulders. I mussed my hair out of its neat business like crop into something wilder and spiked then reached up and stole Jared’s sunglasses. No one would now take me for the man in the suit who had run up the street. In my ear, I could finally hear Chris swearing as he clicked the comms back on. He was muttering something about jamming signals. I spoke loudly, to him and Jared. “I have to leave for the airport at ten in the morning. But I’ll be your buddy until then.”

Jared suddenly pulled me closer against my side. “Just until the morning? Do you fancy touring the inside of my hotel room until then?” His voice was dark and promising.

“Lead on!”

****

“That is fine and well, Agent Ackles. It does not seem to explain why Mr Padalecki became embroiled in the Miller Directive operation.”

“That came later. After we’d met a few more times and...”

“And can you detail those interactions for the record.”

****

For some reason, injuring a fellow agent necessitated a mandatory leave of absence. Chris wasn’t too bothered about the bullet that had winged him. In fact, he thanked me after he’d stopped swearing. The bullet had winged Chris and taken out the keypad lock on the door that was preventing us hastily leaving the underground lab. The fact that we’d also managed to blow the whole base up and extract the captive American scientist who’d been rumored to be imprisoned there as well as sending all the files off their network to Misha for analysis was apparently being taken into consideration.

Chris hadn’t really bled that badly. It was just a flesh wound.

But I had ten days off in a row. No missions, no flights around the world and, most of all, no shooting at anyone intentionally or otherwise. I tided my condo. I painted the deck. I mowed the lawn. I read a book that I’d predicted the ending of by the second chapter. I caught up on three box sets of 24, laughing all the time. I was pretty bored by day five. Therefore I decided to go for a jog in the local park.

I had stopped for a drink of water and didn’t notice the enormous dog chasing a squirrel across the grass until it ploughed into me. The dog, not the squirrel. Then the dog’s owner, attached by the leash, knocked me over. I’d recognize that floppy hair anywhere.

“I didn’t know you had a dog,” I said, in lieu of a proper greeting.

“I didn’t know you lived around here,” Jared reproached. “He’s new. I just got back from Europe – England – and one of my friends works at this rescue place. He was going to be put to sleep if...” Jared let his voice trail off. The dog had given up on the squirrel and was crouched in a most undignified pose, scratching behind its ear with one of its back paws. “Harley. Is his name.”

I stuck out my hand and Harley rebalanced his limbs to offer me a paw. “Nice to meet you. You owe me a bottle of water.”

Jared laughed. “C’mon sourpuss. I’ll buy you some coffee.”

Maybe the rest of my enforced break wouldn’t be that bad after all.

 

It turned out that Jared was living with the friend from the animal shelter. Sophia was her name. She was a petite brunette who threatened to take my balls off with garden shears if I hurt Jared. Again. Apparently she didn’t approve of the hook-ups we’d had previously. Since I spent a long time at their apartment over the next two days, I really came to appreciate the real intent of Sophia’s threat. She ruled her somewhat interesting boyfriend Chad with a rod of iron.

Jared just laughed at her ever more gory descriptions of what she’d do to Chad when he didn’t call to let her know he’d be late for dinner. Apparently this was one of Sophia’s quirks that he adored. Sophia also took it upon herself to interrogate me thoroughly. Jared, for all his laidback manner, was also listening intently.

“What do you do, Jensen? I need to know you can keep my boy in the style to which he’d like to become accustomed,” she asked pointedly.

I guess my mysterious man persona wouldn’t get me very far with her. “I travel a lot and write about places.”

“A travel writer,” Sophia bluntly corrected. “And does it pay well?”

“It pays okay.” Government salary wasn’t a fortune but I rarely had time to spend it on anything beyond the basics. “Enough to keep Jared in gummi worms and ice cream.” Jared blushed at that. He’d admitted to having a sweet tooth when I’d come across a couple of empty packets when disposing of a condom the other night.

And of course, when Chad finally showed for dinner, we had to absent ourselves. Jared and I had been planning to watch some baseball and order in Chinese but the incipient lovebird make up sex would probably put us off both forever, or so Jared assured me. He suggested watching the game at a bar.

And I had a decision to make. If this was only going to be another random hook up, I’d agree to the bar. On the other hand... “We could just shift the party to my condo. I’m pretty sure I’ll get the game there.”

Jared smiled like I’d presented him with free reign of a candy store.

****

“That explains the development of your relationship. But can we move along now. I want details of how Rosenbaum became involved.”

“That comes after Jared moved in with me.”

“Pick up the story from there then.”

****

Chad had proposed to Sophia a week previously and Sophia had decided to say not yet rather than yes or no. She wanted Chad to move in with her though. Jared phoned to tell me all this while I was conducting surveillance of the JDM Offices in Washington DC. Chris kept shooting me amused glances as I could only slip in the odd “yes” and “hmm” between Jared’s excited description. Apparently Chad had gone all out on the proposal – a private yacht and really expensive champagne. Jared and Harley had actually spent the night at the animal shelter to allow them some privacy.

Jared started bemoaning the fact he’d have to find another roommate when I blurted out, “Why don’t you move in with me?”

Chris dropped the binoculars he was watching the main entrance of the skyscraper through and turned to glare at me.

“Are you sure? We’ve only been dating a few months.” Jared’s question gave me the perfect get out clause. Chris was shaking his head slowly and mouthing no at me.

I ignored them both. “Sure. I’ve got lots of room. And you could always just have the spare bedroom. Like roommates. Your own space. To see how it goes.”

Jared laughed. “I doubt I’d ever sleep anywhere but with you. But this is a big step. I haven’t even met most of your friends or anything. And Harley...”

“Jared,” I interrupted. “I’m in the middle of something-“ Chris was now drawing his finger across his throat. He glanced out of the window and then reached hurriedly for the camera. “I’m due back tomorrow. Sophia isn’t going to kick you out that quickly. We can talk about this face to face.”

“Sure.” Jared sounded worried. I had a sinking feeling in my gut. Maybe I’d pushed him too far. Then he added. “I think I’d really really like to live with you. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

I ended the call with an enormous grin on my face and turned to turn on the directional mike. Morgan himself had stepped out of the offices for a cigarette. He had interesting company. It was Welling, Rosenbaum’s right hand man.

 

I phoned Jared when my plane landed and he met me at my front door, Harley straining at his side. I stood at the curbside for a moment, just watching them waving at me. Jared was waving, Harley was wagging his tail. It was the same kind of movement. It was then that I stopped regretting asking him to move in and realizing how nice it was to have someone waiting at the door for me.

I trotted up the front path, dropped my bags at my feet and wrapped my arms around Jared. “Hi.”

Jared responded by leaning down and kissing me thoroughly. We reluctantly broke apart when Harley started barking. Jared kept his free arm wrapped securely around me as I turned to see what had agitated Harley. My neighbor was coming up his driveway. He was smiling, albeit a trifle awkwardly.

“Hello, Mr Kelly,” I shouted. “This is Jared. He’s my boyfriend and he’s going to be around a lot. And Harley, too.” I had to lift one hand free from Jared’s waist to point appropriately.

Mr Kelly nodded. “Nice to meet you, Jared.” He unlocked his front door and vanished behind it.

Jared nuzzled at my neck. “Boyfriend, am I?”

“Well, you’re not Yoda,” I teased. “And yeah. I’ve got something for you.”

“Do we need to be inside for you to give it to me?” Jared’s nuzzling started to include a little bit of lips and tongue. I could feel a tingle of desire shooting up my back.

“No.” Jared looked disappointed. “Not yet.” He looked happier. I dug in the pocket of my jeans for a moment. I’d stopped at the kiosk in the airport and finally found the spare key they’d cut. “Even if you would rather not move in with me, I want you to have this.”

Jared took the key from me and weighed it in his palm. He didn’t say anything.

I, on the other hand, felt the need to fumble ahead. “It’s just that you – and Harley – mean something special to me. And I want you to be free to do what you want but I really like the idea of coming home from one of these trips and sliding into bed beside you. And being able to kiss you when I want to.”

Jared took the hint. He leaned down and covered my mouth with his quite enthusiastically. I felt Harley lie down on the steps and the kiss deepened. When Jared drew back, he looked me straight in the eyes. “There’s something I’m going to have to say before I say yes to moving in with you. I’m pretty sure I’m falling in love with you. Just so you know.”

I kissed him again. It was easier than telling him the truth. That I was pretty sure I was in love with him too.

 

Of course, you don’t realize until later why making out on your front porch after coming straight from the airport is a bad plan. You never know who is watching.

****  
“That explains how Rosenbaum knew to start surveillance on Mr Padalecki. I want to move forward to the operation in Chicago.”

“The one with the thing?”

“The one where Mr Padalecki seemed to make contact with Rosenbaum’s organization.”

“That’s not...”

“Just the events, Agent Ackles.”

****  
Chris seemed oddly chirpy when he assigned me to infiltrate a suspected terror cell’s base of operations in Chicago. Like most would be villains they had a front. Eastern Europeans seemed keen on strip joints and clubs. Italian-Americans liked olive oil importers and restaurants. This lot were white supremacists. I must admit that I thought I was going to get lucky. They were going to have a decent barbecue restaurant or a diner or something. Instead, their front was a gym.

I put Jared’s oddly subdued reaction to my leaving to the back of my mind as I pounded on the treadmill. I’d taken out a month’s membership and had been coming here every day since. Three days later, I had the place pretty much cased and was preparing to make my move. Breaking in during the evening seemed like the easiest way to infiltrate the back room. Some of the tools Steve had provided me with should be enough to circumnavigate their security system.

My cell phone had a message on it when I came out of the shower. It was from Jared. _Hope you don’t mind. I’m at O’Hare. See you at your hotel._

Fuck. My hotel room was fairly clean but there were a few gadgets that would require some explaining if Jared was to come across them. Like the gun cleaning kit. Not to mention the fact that Chris was staying in the same room. I hailed a cab instead of waiting for the El.

Jared was waiting for me in the lobby.

It was weird. On one hand, I was pissed that he had came all the way here without warning me and would be interrupting a fairly important mission. On the other hand, there was a tight feeling in my chest as I saw him standing there, duffle at his feet and a grin on his face as he talked to one of the uniformed hotel staff. He looked like a giant next to the petite brunette. It was hard to keep a smile from my face.

I also noticed Chris stalking around the lobby. He spotted me outside and brushed past, dropping a key card into my hand. “Room 355. I’ve moved your stuff. You need to get rid of him.” Chris hailed a cab and headed out.

Jared saw me the minute I walked through the door. He broke off his conversation and looked at me. His face lit up. It’s hard to describe. It was as if the sun had suddenly risen and he just reacted. His smile was blinding but it was the look in his eyes that made it all worthwhile. I felt myself responding.

“Hi,” I said, when I reached him.

“Hi,” he replied.

Later on-

****

“Agent Ackles. I have to remind you this interview is a matter of Federal record. You must submit to full disclosure.”

“Sure. Do you want to know what position the sex was in?”

“Oh. Continue please, as you see fit.”

****

Later on, Jared decided that I should take him out to a club as that was what my cover was all about. Luckily, I had done some research and there was a club quite near our target. It was quite late when we arrived at the club – a gay bar, if you must know – but Jared was still on West Coast time and very awake.

He seemed up for dancing all night. I had two options. I could spike his drink, knock him unconscious and pretend that someone else must have done it. Or I could sneak out of the club, break into the gym, get the information and get back to Jared before he was any the wiser. This was much more difficult but somehow seemed to be the right thing to do. I was lying to Jared enough without poisoning him.

I told him I was going to the bathroom. The place was busy enough that the bathrooms were pretty chaotic. I didn’t really want to think about what else was going on in them. I ducked around the corner, through a fire escape and was shimmying up the back wall of the gym a few minutes later. Chris crackled into life in my ear, directing me to the alarm box. I disabled it and slid into the gym through the service entrance.

That’s where the plan went off the rails. The gym was not as empty as it was supposed to be. Instead, there were voices echoing out of one of the private exercise studios. I checked that my weapon was ready and made my way to the backroom where there was a door leading to a hidden staircase. Everything seemed quiet here. I used the code scrambler to break the lock and headed down into the basement.

It was pretty clear that the terror cell were using this place as their base. The walls were covered in maps and diagrams. I quickly snapped off a dozen shots as I waited for the flash drive to hack their rather rudimentary computer system. Within four minutes, I was on my way back up the stairs again.

This time, the voices from the room weren’t just echoing. They were shouting quite forcefully. I couldn’t help but hear the thud of fist against flesh. Chris was yelling in my ear to get out of there but I had to take a look. Using the tiny camera, I snapped likenesses of everyone in the room and kept taking pictures when I realized on of the thugs was pulling a gun. There were four people in the room: a man on his knees, a man in a suit and two men who could only be described as thugs. I could only see one gun, though.

I made a snap decision then. Pulling my own weapon, I shot first at the single light illuminating the room. As it went dark, I rushed in, grabbing the man on his knees and dragged him towards the exit. Luckily he seemed to get with the program as the others shouted in confusion. I felt the zing of a bullet against my shoulder before we were out of the door and running for the back wall. I boosted my new friend up the brick before scrabbling up after him. The bullets struck the wall beside my hand, sending puffs of dust off into the night. Then we were over and running for the van Chris had running on the other side of the road.

“You okay?” Chris asked as he pulled away from the curb and turned into the stream of traffic.

I nodded, grabbing a bottle of water from the dash. “Yup. And brought you a tasty treat for questioning.” The truck jolted and water splashed down my front. “And now I need to go back to Jared.” I pulled at the shirt, noting a bloodstain and grease marks that hadn’t been there before. “Shit.”

Chris dropped me at the rear of the club, promising to see our new friend delivered safely into custody. I had no idea what to do. I was also starting to realize exactly how long I’d left Jared alone in the club.

Jared’s eyes nearly popped out of his head when I met him again. “Jensen?” he asked, tone wondering.

I molded my body up against his and purred into his ear, “Yes, Jared.”

“Weren’t you wearing a shirt earlier?” I could feel Jared’s breath quickening and he ran his hands possessively up my now naked back.

“Some douche spilled beer on me. I was trying to get it washed off and then the shirt was pretty much ruined. And I thought you wouldn’t mind...” I let the excuse drip off my tongue like the dirtiest bedroom talk imaginable.

Jared wrapped me even more firmly in his arms. “I don’t mind. I’m rather minding all those eyes that watched you strut across the dance floor though.”

“Watch me walk right into your arms.” I whispered the last, face pressed close against Jared’s smooth cheek. I could feel him let loose a soft groan. “Have you had enough dancing?”

****  
“I fail to see what bearing this incident has on the case, Agent Ackles.”

“Just listen.”

****

The hotel did a breakfast and no matter how late we’d been up the previous night, Jared insisted on trying it out. I must admit that I wasn’t paying much attention to anything other than putting one foot in front of the other when Jared suddenly waved and towed me across the room.

We ended up standing in front of Rosenbaum and Welling themselves.

“Hey guys. Nice to see you again.” Jared shook hands with Tom and bumped fists with Mike. I stood beside him trying not to gape. “This is Jensen. Told you he wasn’t imaginary.”

I was suddenly fixed with the attention of two of the country’s most wanted domestic terrorists. I smiled wanly. They murmured greetings.

Jared, luckily, didn’t seem to put my awkward silence down to anything other than normal morning behavior. “Jensen’s not worth talking to unless he’s had about five cups of coffee. Guess I’ll see you later.” And then Jared ruffled my hair affectionately, laughed as I ducked away and scowled and pulled me away to a table across the room.

“How’d you meet them?” I asked, trying to keep my voice disinterested and calm.

Jared laughed at me. “You can’t be jealous. Not after I flew all the way out here to see you.” Jared shuffled closer. “Not after last night.”

I am ashamed to admit it, but I flushed at that, remembering the banging that had come from the room next door (Chris’ room, now I thought about it) when we had been a little enthusiastic. “Just interested. I never understand how you manage to make so many friends.” I said the last a little wistfully. Making friends in my line of work was pretty impossible.

“Met them at the airport and got chatting. They thought that me coming out here to surprise you was cute.” Jared laughed at himself. “I was worried it was going to come across as a bit stalkery.”

I watched him sternly, trying to freak him out as I weighed the two options. I couldn’t keep it up in the face of his panicked expression. I smiled at him. “I wouldn’t say cute. I would say adorable. And kinda hot.”

“Want to take breakfast back to the room?”

 

It turned out that Jared had done more than just chat to Rosenbaum and Welling. He’d exchanged cell numbers with them. I checked his phone while he was in the shower and called Chris. The tap was set up before I’d even deleted the call from my phone memory.

****  
“That seems quite innocent.”

“I keep telling you. Jare- Mr Padalecki is an unwitting participant in this entire situation. It’s all my fault that he-“

“The facts will let us know where to assign blame. The next part of the tale please.”

****  
Much as I ran the events of Chicago in my head, I couldn’t see anything more sinister than Jared being his usual friendly self in the meeting with Rosenbaum and Welling. I also found it quite interesting that they had been in Chicago at the same time the white supremacists were preparing to make a move. The debriefing at HQ seemed to suggest that Mike was planning to make a move based on the information we’d gathered.

What that move actually entailed was the puzzling part.

Of course I had to report Jared’s interaction. There was some discussion between the others about what to do. Misha suggested telling Jared the truth but was quickly shot down. Chris was all for me ending it with Jared but Kripke seemed in favor of my continuing the relationship. “After all, he said. Now Jared is involved, we may be able to find another way into their organization.”

“You want to let them recruit Jared?” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.

“Not recruit. But if the friendship gains us access...” Kripke and the others drifted off to discuss the ways in which they could exploit my boyfriend. I stayed out of the conversation. All I could think was that I wanted to keep Jared close so I could keep him safe.

 

The others were jubilant when I told them about the invitation Jared and I had received to go to Tom and Mike’s for dinner. I just wondered what they could gain by pretending to be a couple. When we arrived at their condo, I realized that this was somewhere we’d never had under surveillance in the past. A traitorous thought that maybe the others were right crept across my mind. I tugged Jared closer.

Lying about who I am and what I do is second nature by now. I’d never get anywhere if I didn’t know how to compartmentalize. But seeing these guys play house together made it really hard to reconcile my previous impression of them as evil masterminds out to bring down the country I was trying to protect. Tom teased Mike about the fact he’d shaved his head as part of a dare and explained the whole story to me while Mike tried to show Jared how to stroke their cat without being scratched.

The bug I was supposed to place was burning a hole in my pocket.

Jared pulled me close when Mike and Tom took the dinner plates through to the kitchen. “You’re being awfully quiet. Everything okay?”

I looked up to see the affection in his eyes. There was no suspicion there. Instead there was a depth of love that was quite frightening. “I’m okay,” I lied. “I’m just a bit tired.”

“We can go. It’d be fine.” Jared rubbed his huge hand up and down my back soothingly.

“Nah. I’ll just hit the bathroom. Wash my face.” I stood up and headed for the door leading through to the rest of the house. “Second door on the right?”

Jared nodded. He looked concerned as I headed out. I dropped the sick act and started quietly opening doors. The first door was a broom closet. The second a bedroom. The door opposite the bathroom led into a study. I pulled the bug out of my pocket and quickly placed it under the desk. It shouldn’t be spotted there. I closed the door as silently as I could. The door back to the front of the house opened so I ducked into the bathroom and flushed the toilet.

Mike was waiting for me as I came out. “Everything alright, Jensen?”

I kept waiting for him to leer at me suspiciously or twirl his non-existent moustache or something. But he kept up his persona of a perfectly ordinary dude.

“Yeah. Just a bit unwell.” I rubbed at my stomach suggestively to try and stop any further questions. “Better now.”

“Oh. Hope it wasn’t the cooking.” Mike looked really upset.

“Not at all,” I reassured him. I suddenly wanted him to feel at ease. “I think it was the tuna I had for lunch. And I was kinda nervous about meeting you guys. I don’t normally do the dinner party thing.”

“Man,” Mike said, patting me on the back. “This isn’t a dinner party. This is just hanging out. Come and get some dessert. If you’re up for it.”

“Always up for pudding.”

****  
“What happened to the bug?”

“It never worked. We found out later there were jamming devices throughout the house.”

“Why don’t you move to that part of the story?”

****  
Jared continued to hang out with Tom and Mike. Tom more than Mike, actually. They went running together. Jared said that Mike was away on business a lot, which tallied with the information we had coming into the office. Mike seemed to pop up all over the country, taking meetings with all sorts of groups. Everything was pointing to some kind of coordinated attack.

It was Jared who ended up giving us the information we thought we needed. “Tom said he and Mike were going to have to cancel on us. They can’t come to poker night. Suggested we might want to use the opportunity to have a romantic break ourselves.” Jared rolled over to look at me. He had been asleep when I arrived home and I’d tried to be stealthy climbing into bed beside him. “Spend some time reconnecting.” His voice was quiet and he wouldn’t meet my eyes.

“Jared?” I wanted him to tell me what was happening.

“It’s just...” Jared looked at me. I was surprised by the depth of anger in his eyes. “I thought that when I moved in here, I’d see more of you. But I don’t.”

“My job... The travelling...” I was trying to come up with excuses.

“Bullshit. I’ve never seen you write anything. All you do is go into the office and work late. I can’t think of the last time you were here at the weekend either.” Jared had obviously been thinking this over for a long time. “And what kind of freelance writer wears suits to the office, anyway.”

“Jared-“ I tried to buy some time.

“Jensen.” He interrupted me by putting a hand across my mouth. “I just- I wish you would tell me the truth. You’re obviously hiding something. Mike thought it was an affair but I don’t know. Just – if you want to break up with me, do it. Rather than driving me away.”

He took his hand away but I couldn’t think of anything to say. I think he took my silence for agreement though. He rolled out of the bed and stood up. “So maybe a romantic break is out of the question. I’ll sleep in the guest room tonight and start looking for a new place tomorrow.”

I let him walk out of the room without saying a word. Maybe it would be better if he left, if he found someone who could be truthful with him. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and glared at it. I should really phone in the news about Mike and Tom’s absence, but work was the last thing on my mind right then. Instead I got ready for bed. The bed that was too big and empty all of a sudden.

 

Jared’s news set everybody’s radar on high alert. I ended up crashing at the office a couple of nights in a row, texting Jared excuses. I think he thought I was staying at Chris’ or sleeping my way around the city. His return texts were curt. Sophia’s friend was looking for a new roommate. They didn’t take dogs. Would I keep Harley for a few weeks while he found him a new home?

I tried to be supportive. I really did. I pretty much agreed to whatever he wanted. He deserved to be happy. Instead I threw myself into work, reading reports, scanning phone records and computer files. Of course it was Misha who came up with the breakthrough.

Misha’s levels of excitement were easily gauged. A stroll through the office meant he had nothing. A quick walk meant he was working on something good. This time, he full on sprinted through the office, waving a huge sheet of paper. It took a moment for everyone to catch on before we all dropped what we were doing and followed him into the conference room. He had laid his paper on the huge table and projected the image onto the wall.

“Coordinated attacks? Right?” Misha seemed to think we were all following his line of thought. “It’s not. It’s supplies. They’re going to attack here.” He pressed a few buttons and an image of a map appeared. The picture zoomed in until it hung over some kind of large industrial building.

“I don’t get it,” Chris muttered, turning his head to look sideways at the building. Misha’s fingers clattered over the keyboard a few more times. The image went from a bird’s eye view to a front facing one. It was no industrial complex. It was a mall.

“There’s going to be an attack here. A biological weapon from the components.” Misha turned around from the screen to look at us all in triumph. His face fell when he realized that we were all staring at him in shock.

Kripke put his hands on the table and leaned forward. “You’re telling me that two of the most wanted domestic terrorists in the country are going to set off a biological weapon in a civilian target in my city and we’ve lost the most valuable source of information we have on their whereabouts.”

Misha gulped. I nodded. Chris looked pissed. There was silence for a moment before we turned and headed for the exit. Chris snatched his keys from his desk. “I’ll drive.”

****  
“Yes, Agent Ackles. We have a copy of Mr Collins’ report right here. It seems to tally with yours so far. So can you explain how Mr Padalecki became further involved?”

“Again, I say, Mr Padalecki is an innocent party in all of this. If it wasn’t for me...”

“The facts, please.”

****

Turned out I knew the mall that they were targeting. Because it was my mall. My local one, I mean. I’d strolled through it to the multiplex with Jared a number of times. Bought most of my clothes there because it was convenient. It was home turf. It was then that I really developed a bad feeling about all this. I tried to ignore the churning in my stomach as I listened to Chris and Kripke hash out the details of the plan.

It feels like a bit of a misnomer calling it a plan when it basically boiled down to “evacuate the mall and find the device”.

We arrived there to find the police trying to hold back the curious milling crowd. The news vans were already there and the place was surrounded. There was obviously no more need for secrecy. Chris still used a SWAT van as cover as he pulled up and we piled out.

The officer in charge, a lean, sharp eyed man tightly bound into the entire SWAT ensemble caught us as we headed for the door. Kripke waved his ID and asked for a status update. It turned out that they’d managed to clear the mall pretty much entirely. Then he paused. I held my breath, fearing the worst.

“There was one last thing, before the security feed was cut.” The officer paused. “We don’t know for sure. But there seemed to be some people still in there. Three of them. We last saw them in the food court.”

I had a horrible suspicion who those three people might be. Instead of worrying about it, letting my imagination run wild, I pulled out my sidearm and checked it was fully loaded.

Kripke was issuing orders. Misha was to try and get the security feed up and running. Chris was to get the floor plans from the planning office. The officer nodded when Kripke asked about the perimeter. I wasn’t listening to any of this. I started walking towards the main entrance.

Kripke caught my arm before I’d gone five steps. “Jensen? Where are you going?”

I shook him off. “Jared’s in there.”

He peered at me suspiciously. “You can’t know that.”

“Welling. Rosenbaum. And their hostage.” I counted it off on my fingers. “Jared. They were probably playing us all along.”

Kripke turned to ask Chris something and I resumed my deliberate walk towards the door. Kripke shouted after me, ordered me to stop. I turned before I reached the doorway. “I’m going to try and buy us some time, some options.”

I pretended not to hear Chris say, “You’re going to get yourself killed” and walked into the mall.

 

In all the rush to get everybody out, no one had thought to turn off the muzak. The incongruously cheerful music sounded much louder than it usually did as I made my way carefully along the main concourse. I knew there was no point in trying to sneak. The door opening would have echoed through the entire building. The squeaking of my shoes on the polished floor seemed to resonate as I came to the main atrium.

The mall was on three levels and the escalators between each floor still spun around pointlessly. The fountain in the food court burbled incessantly. I listened carefully. There didn’t seem to be any sounds that were out of place. A slow hand clap drew my attention to the top of the escalator straight in front of me. I brought my gun up to bear as Mike appeared at the top of the stairs.

“I wouldn’t wave that thing around if I were you, Jensen. Never know what you might hit. Or who.” Mike stepped onto the escalator and behind him Tom pushed Jared onto the steps. They ended up standing only a few feet away. By the way Tom was standing next to and slightly behind Jared, I could tell he had a gun forced into his back. They’d handcuffed Jared’s wrists in front of him and gagged him with some kind of material. There was nothing I wanted to do more than run over and pull it out and kiss him. From the look in his eyes, I wasn’t sure how welcome that gesture would be.

Mike, on the other hand, looked really happy with the turn of events. “I guess you’ve come in to tell us we’re surrounded and we should give up now.”

“I came in to get Jared.” I wasn’t even looking at Mike as I said this. Jared’s eyes widened then he jerked forward a few steps. Tom moved closely behind him, keeping one hand on Jared’s shoulder to keep him in front of him.

“Come and get him then,” Tom said. Gone was the amiable guy who’d taught Jared exactly how to make the perfect banana daiquiri and here was the killer I’d known was lurking there all the time. Mike dropped the act too. It was hard to pinpoint but his face looked sharper, he was standing taller. His whole posture screamed danger.

“I would. If I knew you’d let him go.” I was desperately playing for time. They were too close. “I’d let you take me.”

Mike looked like he might go for it. For a minute, anyway. Then he laughed. “Why have just one when I have two.” He nodded at Tom who brought his gun into view, dragging it around Jared’s waist. “Put your gun on the ground, Ackles.”

“How long have you known?” I asked, as I carefully stooped, keeping my other hand wide and moving slowly to place the gun on the surface. I didn’t drop it, worried it might go off accidentally.

“We always knew,” Tom said. Then Mike came forward and hit me with the grip of his gun. I saw Jared’s eyes widen in shock as I dropped to the ground then everything faded out.

 

I woke up slowly. At first I thought I was asleep in bed. There was a warm figure pressed up against my side and I thought that Jared had forgiven me and moved back home. I nuzzled at the figure. Then I realized he wasn’t wound tightly around me like he would normally be. Instead he was stiff. I woke up a bit more and opened my eyes. One looked at Jared and I remembered where we had been.

Somehow, we’d ended up in the bedding department of the department store that made up one end of the mall. Jared was mutinously looking at me as I twisted to face him. He was still gagged and handcuffed and I’d been similarly bound. I took a long moment to look him up and down, checking for bruises and wounds. He looked okay. I brought my forehead close to reassure him – or to reassure myself. His hands scrabbled for mine and Jared held me close.

Then I rolled over and used my feet to prop myself into a sitting position. They’d been tied with rope. Guess I wasn’t meant to go anywhere. I looked down to see that Jared had been trussed up as well. I could see Tom and Mike discussing something fiercely at the end of the aisle. Very carefully I brought my hands up to eye level to look at the lock. It seemed fairly simple. Keeping a close eye on the arguing couple, I brought my hands down to the waistband of my pants. Mentally praying, I pushed at my belt buckle and was happy when the front opened slightly, revealing a tiny hidden compartment. It was big enough for an emergency communicator and a lock pick.

Jared nudged against me. I looked down to see him waving his hands in amusement. I couldn’t help quirking an eyebrow at him and he responded by rolling his eyes. It felt as if our estrangement had never happened. This was always how Jared and I acted. Easy. Comfortable. It sent a warm feeling through me. Suddenly, it really mattered that we both got through this, not just Jared.

I brought my attention back to my cuffs, making short work of the simple lock. I leaned over to unfasten Jared’s too. Mike was now on his cell phone, obviously unhappy with what he was hearing from the other side. Tom was leaning close, trying to hear what was being said. Their attention was elsewhere.

Jared brought his hands up and pulled off the gag the minute his hands were free. I followed suit, but leaned close to whisper, “Do you know where the device is?” before he could say anything.

“It’s in Mike’s pocket,” Jared whispered back, voice equally soft. “It looks like a tiny camping flask.”

“Okay. I’m going to distract them. I want you to get on the floor and crawl towards the emergency exit. Put your hands above your head as you leave.” Jared looked like he was ready to protest so I leaned forward. “If you do it, I’ll explain everything. Full disclosure.”

Jared leaned in close. “Promise.”

Instead of answering, I place a swift kiss on his lips. I pulled back to see an odd resignation in his eyes. I think he understood that the chances of me making it out of here were fairly minimal. Jared nodded and rolled off the bed. I rolled in the opposite direction and immediate bent to untie my legs. Jared hadn’t bothered with that. He started making his way to the exit immediately.

Our sudden movement had attracted the attention of Tom and Mike. Our disappearing act, however, gave us some breathing room. I pulled the emergency comm out and snuck it into my ear. “Are you receiving?”

Chris’ voice crackled through the earpiece. “Jensen? Thank Christ.”

I was touched at my friend’s concern. I ducked behind a display of pillows, carefully watching for any unexpected movement. “Jared’s on his way out. Mike has the weapon here. Once Jared is out, I say you come in. I’ll try and keep them distracted.” I spun around the corner of the aisle to see Tom’s grinning face. I ducked the blow he sent in my direction and noticed my gun was tucked into his belt. I swept my legs around, bringing him to his knees and dealt him a blow to the back of skull with the stiffened side of my hand. His eyes rolled back in his head. I grabbed my gun and spun around. Mike was nowhere to be seen.

“Tom is down. I repeat. Welling is down. Rosenbaum is not in sight.” I kept my voice low as I made my way carefully around the displays of linen and curtains. A shot rang out, echoing loudly in the silent store. “Jared!”

I gave up any pretence at stealth and ran in the direction of the shot. I saw Mike waving his revolver and didn’t even hesitate, bringing up my gun and pumping three shots directly over his heart. He crumpled to the ground as I ran past him.

Jared was pale when I got to him, a red rose blooming through his sweater. He was breathing heavily. I could hear the pounding feet of the SWAT team behind me.

“Jensen?” Jared’s voice was soft, barely audible.

“I’m here. I’m not leaving. Not leaving. You can’t leave me.” My words were panicked, thoughtless. I had to keep Jared with me. I pressed my hands urgently to his wound. “You can’t leave. I love you. Love you.”

Jared looked at me then. “You love me? You didn’t say that before.”

My hands scrabbled at his side, desperate to stop the flow of blood. “I love you. Stay. Don’t die. Stay.”

Jared’s head slumped to the side. The SWAT team pulled me off him, taking my gun and then Chris was there, restraining me, as the paramedics shook their heads and fastened a frightening amount of white gauze around Jared’s torso. White gauze that very swiftly became red.

****  
“Are you okay, Agent Ackles? Do you need a moment?”

“No. I’m fine. Where were we?”

****  
Jared was pretty serious hurt. Mike knew where to shoot and if it hadn’t been for the paramedics pretty much already there I don’t think he would have made it. Instead he ended up in the clinic in the basement of headquarters.

He wasn’t too happy at being kept there, to say the least.

I was watching him on the security monitor. For some reason, I couldn’t go into the room and speak to him. Chris seemed content to watch me watch Jared for quite a while. I knew I was letting him see my nervousness, from the way I obsessively straightened my tie and the number of aborted conversations I tried to start. Eventually I reached even the end of Chris’ patience.

He signaled this by cuffing the back of my head. “Get in there and talk to him.”

“What?” I brought my hand to my mouth and started to bite at one of my fingernails. Chris knocked my hand aside.

“Get in there before I push you in and lock the door. Jared is going out of his mind because he hasn’t seen hide nor hair of you.” Chris was walking towards me now, menacingly, forcing me backwards towards the door of Jared’s room. Since discretion is the better part of valor and all, I thought he was probably right.

Jared stopped flicking through the magazine that someone had given him the instant I stepped through the door. His eyes seemed to drink in my presence.

“Hey, Jay. Thought I’d come see how you were doing.” There was no need to mention the hour I’d spent outside his room. Or the endless hours pacing the waiting room during his surgery. “Had to get the paperwork up to date. You know how it is.”

“I don’t, actually.” His voice was controlled. Too controlled. He was angry. That was not good.

“Second year of college,” I said.

Jared looked nonplussed. It was better than angry. “What?”

“That’s when I was recruited.” I blurted it all out. “I liked the idea of being useful. My degree wasn’t going to get me a job and I enjoyed it. I liked the physical side almost as much as the mental. I was good at it.” Jared’s eyes followed me as I walked the room. “I wasn’t allowed to tell anyone. It just isn’t done. Because it can put anyone I tell in danger. I didn’t want to put you in danger.”

I came back to stand by the bed. Jared still didn’t say anything. “If I could take it all back, I would. I would have stayed away from you and let you be just the guy at the animal shelter with the amazing body and the kindest eyes. But I’m sorry.”

Jared bowed his heads to look at his hands clasped on the blanket. “So you wouldn’t give me any choice in the matter?”

“I don’t want you to get hurt. Because...” I trailed off. “Well, you know why.”

Jared’s mouth tightened again. “You can’t even say it. How can I trust you ever again if you won’t even say it?”

“I’m sorry.” I came to stand beside the bed. I reached my hand out to place it over Jared’s on the sheets but drew it back to my side when he didn’t respond. “I’ll just leave you to it.”

I could feel his eyes on my back as I headed to the door. I opened it wide then hesitated. “I do love you. Pretty much more than anything. More than my job, that’s for sure.”

I waited a minute but Jared didn’t say anything as I shut the door behind me.

****

“That all seems to be in order, Agent Ackles. Unless you have anything else to add.”

“There’s one more thing. I have to report a change in status.”

“A change in status? What sort of change?”

“A name change. It’s Agent Padalecki-Ackles now. Double-barreled.”


End file.
